Why Worry

  I have been involved in an online bible study called Am I Messing Up My Kids. The focus of this week is Why Worry?

Why do I worry? That’s an excellent question. I have been known as a worry wart for most of my life. If there is nothing to worry about I find things to worry about. Being a mom brings about even more worries than I had before.

Why worry? Why do I worry?

I worry all the time…

But God says that worry is counterproductive. It does not change anything, and brings harm to us.

“Which one of you by worry can add a single hour to his span of life” Luke 12:25

“Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down…” Proverbs 12:25

I worry about our finances. I worry that we will not be able to provide enough for our son. I worry that we will not have enough money to pay bills, or buy the things we need…

But God says that he will provide us with everything we need.

“And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches and glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6

I worry about my son. I worry about his well-being. I worry about whether or not I am  a good enough mother.

But God say that he cares for my son. He wants my son to be near to him. My job is to teach Ezra about Jesus. If I do this, even if he strays from the Lord, God says he will always go back to what I taught him about God.

“Jesus said ‘let the little children come to me, do not hinder them from me, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Matthew 19:14

“Start your children off on the way to go and even when they are older they will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

I worry I will make mistakes, as a parent, a wife, in general. Sometimes I try to be perfect. 

God says I will make mistakes. I will never be close to perfect. I am a sinner. But God also says despite my shortcomings I can find my strength in him. His grace is enough for me.

“For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” Romans 3:23

“But he said to me, ‘my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ’s power will rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

I worry I will say or do the wrong thing to people. I worry other people will judge me or talk bad about me. I am afraid of rejection. Sometimes I am afraid to do what God wants me to do because I worry others won’t like me.

But God tells me I should be more concerned about what he thinks about me than what others think of me.

“Fear not them that which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul, but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” Mathew 10:28

The world is filled with so much corruption and destruction. Every time I turn on the news or read my Facebook my mind runs rampant with all of the bad things that could happen to me or the people I love.

But God says that he will protect me and my loved ones.

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for you are with me. Your rod and staff they comfort me. “Psalm 23:4

I often tell myself that I am a worrier. It’s just the way I am. My mom was a worrier. My grandmother was a worrier. My family line consist of women worry warts. This is just who I am and I can’t change it.

But God tells me that I am not a worrier, and that he has given me peace. I do not have to live in fear, but I can walk in God’s peace.

“Peace I leave to you my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. “John 14:27

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. “ Colossians 3:15

Why do I worry?

God says that I do not have anything to be worried or fearful of. All I need to do is give my concerns to him, and he will take care of it. He alleviates my anxiety and give me peace if I trust in him.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4 : 6-7

“Cast all your cares on the Lord. He will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.” Psalm 55:22

Why do you worry? What does God say about your worries and fears?

Favorite Ways to Relax and Refill

When my son was born I started to feel guilty when I had “me time.” Before he was born, I was always on the go, involved in a lot of volunteer work, bible studies, and activities. After my son was born, I cut back on a lot of things, so that I could have more free time to be home with my son. There was nothing wrong with me wanting to have more time to spend with my son. I still continued some of the activities I was in before my son, but I felt guilty every time I left the house without him. When he was born, I cut back on the time I spent reading the bible and praying. I told myself I was busy, and didn’t have much time. Didn’t have much time? Seriously? Isn’t it ridiculous that we get too busy for God, when he is the thing in life we need the most? How did I think I would function as a new mom without  God?

                I enjoy writing, but after my son was born I didn’t have time for that either. I stopped doing a lot of things I enjoyed doing to have more time with my son. I acted like Robo-Mom spending all of my free time taking care of my son or trying to maintain my house.   told myself I was being a good mom,  sacrificing the things I loved for  my son, but I started feeling empty inside. I needed my time with God, and I needed my “me time.” I started to realize, that if I did not make time to relax and refill I would be empty inside, and if I am empty inside I will not have anything to give to the people in my life, my husband, my son, my family, and friends. You cannot give what you do not have to give. I started making my God time and my “me time” a priority in my life. I pray and read the bible first thing every morning. That’s what I did before I was a mom, why should I stop now?  I am trying not to feel guilty about the activities I am involved in. I did cut back a lot, and it’s okay for me to have some time away from my son. I write every day, now even if it is just for ten minutes a day with my son next to me. It helps me to refill, and energizes, because writing is one of the things God created me to do. I am able to maintain my house better and take care of my son better, when I make God priority and little have a little time for me every day.

Here are some of the things I do to relax and refill:

·         Read the bible

·         Pray

·         Write letters to God. (It’s one of the ways I pray. I feel more connected to God , when I express myself to him in my writing)

·         Listen to music

·         Worship God

·         Read ( I am enjoying reading the Am I Messing Up my Kids. It is part of  an online bible study I have been doing that has helped me to refill as well.

·         Work on my son’s scrapbook, baby book, or journal.  (I am keeping a journal of all the things he does I want to remember

·         Exercise ( I always feel refreshed after I work out. It gives me energy. My son likes to sit in his swing and smile at me while I work out.

What are some things that you like to do to relax and refill?
                

Being a Mother is Tough

Being a mommy is tough! When I was waiting for the arrival of my little man, I had this image in my mind of how I thought motherhood would be. Sure, I knew that I would face difficulties as a parent, but I thought that being a mommy would come naturally and relatively easy. I had always wanted children. (At one time I wanted to have four of my own children and adopt kids that needed a family. That was before I met my husband, and before he looked at me like I had was an elephant wearing clown shoes or something, when I told him how many kids I wanted. We decided 3 was a more reasonable number of children to aim for.) The truth is my mom made being mommy look so easy. She was always there for us, and showed me the meaning of unconditional love.

            When I was pregnant, my mother said that when Ezra was born she was going to come to my house and help me with him for a few weeks. She said she could clean the house for me or watch Ezra, while I took a nap. I told her she could come, but I didn’t really think I would need that much help. Then people kept asking me if I was going to have someone to help me out after Ezra was born.  I remember thinking, “Why does everyone keep asking me that? I got this!” I thought I was going to be super mom, donning a pink cape with the letters SM stitched to my costume. I envisioned myself flying around my house, caring for a newborn with a perfectly plastered smile on my face, as I continued to prepare home cooked meals, and keep the house spotless, while my sweet angel of a baby boy napped.

            Boy was I in for a rude awakening when I came home with my son! I had given up coffee, during pregnancy. The plan was to continue to stay away from caffeine, because I was breastfeeding and I did not want my son exposed to caffeine. After the first night of barely any sleep I quickly downed a cup of coffee. I exclusively breast feed my son. I knew that this was best for my son and it couldn’t be that tough right? Wrong! Breastfeeding is painful. In the beginning my baby boy ate every hour and a half. I felt like all I was doing was feeding my son, and if I got to sleep for twenty minute increments at night I felt like I was in heaven. I quickly realized how much I truly needed caffeine.  I did not prepare home cooked meals for a while. Fast food became my new best friend, and if my house ever was clean it was because my mother had come over and helped me. (I quickly welcomed her help.)

            I soon learned that being a mother is tough. I thought that it would get easier. It some way it has. My son is now four months. I have been getting more sleep. Before being a mommy I never realized that five hours of sleep is a blessing. I am able to cook again, and my son doesn’t eat every hour and a half anymore. But my house is still not spotless, and being a mom is still tough. But I love every crazy minute of it. I love my son and wouldn’t trade my tough days with him for easier ones.

            Being a mommy taught me one thing. I can’t do it on my own. I need help. In the beginning I needed my mom’s help. I need my husband’s help, and of course I need the most help from God. I have realized that I am not Super Mom. I never will be. The only way that I will be able to do this mommy thing is if I stay on my knees, looking up to God for guidance. If being a mommy had taught me anything it is humility and how much I need God’s help in all things.