My Big Mouth

“He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.” Proverbs 13: 3

                For the past few weeks I have been reading through the book of Proverbs. A reoccurring them has been the power of words, and the negative effects my big mouth has on the people in my life. The past few weeks I have been reexaming my words. I have been thinking about all of the times, I should have kept my mouth shut, but instead opened my lips wide. I began to think of the destruction that my words may have caused those I care about.  

“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.” Proverbs 14: 1.

                As I read this verse last week, I began to think about how it applies to my words. As a wife and a mother my words have the power to either build my house up or tear it down. I must continually ask myself are the words I use at home foolish or wise? Am I building up my house or am I tearing it down? My 15 month old son is a reminder of how important my words are. He is a little sponge, and he picks up every word I say. As he is learning to talk, he is learning the words I use, the tones I use, the facial expressions I use. He is observing the way I respond to him, and the way I respond to my husband. The words I speak to my husband are important. I can either build him up with words of love and encouragement or tear him down with words of criticism.

“He who is slow to wrath has great understanding, but he who is impulsive exalts folly.” Proverbs 14:29.

‘’…The contentions of a wife are a continual dripping.” Proverbs 19:13

                I think the times that I use my words to tear my house down the most are when I am angry. This is the time that I don’t think about my words before I say them. My words become impulsive; I say harsh things before I think. I get angry and my nagging words become a “constant drip.” When I am angry I need to remember how important it is to control my words. What are some ways I can watch my words when I am angry?

“A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, and contentions are like the bars of a castle.” Proverbs 18:19.

I must try not be easily offended.  When I get offended, I start to take everything the wrong way, I get mad at things I normally would not get mad about, and I tend to blow up. It is difficult for me to let things go, when I offended and hold on to things longer instead of forgiving them.

“A man who has knowledge spares his words and a man of understanding has a calm spirit. Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace. When he shuts his lips he is considered perceptive.”

“Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam, so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.” Proverbs  17:14

                Sometimes I just need to shut my mouth. I need a time out. I need time to cool off and think, before I start speaking harsh words. I need to pray and ask God how to handle the situations. Often times when I cool off, and calm down I have a different perspective and can better resolve a situation than when I am angry and in the moment.

“Pride goes before destruction a haughty spirit before a fall” Proverbs 16:18.

Sometimes I just need to humble myself. I need to lay my pride aside, and admit when I was wrong.

“A fool finds no pleasure in understanding, but delights in airing his own opinions.” Proverbs  18:2

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this Everyone must be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” James 1:19

Sometimes when I have a disagreement, I am more concerned about getting my feelings across, then listening to what the other person is saying. I get so caught up in what I next retort will be that, it is impossible for me to understand what the other person is saying. I wonder how much my interactions with others would improve if I would be more focused on understanding than being understood. I wonder how much my communication with others would improve if I would spend less time reacting and more time listening.

 “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” Proverbs 18:21

I think it is important that I examine my words everyday. I should sift the words I use, especially when I am angry. I must remind myself that the words I speak to the people in my life are important. Before I speak words I should determine if they are life giving words or destructive.